I am moving on to suicide. This time I have read the next section, Suicide, in The Oxford Book of Death. Once again, this is a topic that I have not really put much energy into thinking about. I am not sure if that is a good thing or not now that I am in this humanities class.
The first few entries that I read were somewhat difficult for me to interpret. Specifically, I found Shakespeare’s and Emily Dickinson’s entries to be a little difficult for me to follow. I was not able to create an image in my mind which made it hard for me to read. Virginia Woolf, on the other hand, had an interesting letter to her husband, Leonard dated March 18, 1941. After reading this entry, it was clear to me that she was writing this letter at a very bad time in her life. She wrote that she hears voices, she is spoiling his life, and he could work if she were gone. She is extremely depressed and basically says goodbye to him in this letter. She ends the entry with, “I don’t think two people could have been happier than we have been.” She seemed to realize that he was entirely patient with her and incredibly good. I think she was thanking him for that in this last statement. Woolf used powerful words in this short entry.
I read another entry by Camus, op. cit. “I have heard of a post-war writer who, after having finished his first book, committed suicide to attract attention to his work. Attention was in fact attracted, but the book was judged no good.” I followed that direction of thinking too. Suicide is not the way to attract attention to a book. He killed himself but the book still stunk! Here is another letter that caught my focus. It was written by Franz Kafka (1883 – 1924), of himself, in a letter, tr. Ronald Hayman. “You, who can’t do anything, think you can bring off something like that? How can you even dare to think about it? If you were capable of it, you certainly wouldn’t be in need of it.” He is calling himself a wimp right from the start! He admits he cannot do anything. So, how would HE be able to do THAT? I saw a little humor in this one. Last but not least, I came across the letter thanking God for not allowing him success in suicide. This was a letter to The Times dated October 24, 1980. Jean M. Haslam wrote that he attempted suicide several times ten years earlier. He states he is happily married and had an unshakeable religious faith now. It made me glad to see that he was able to turn his life around.

I am back with more! In The Oxford Book of Death, by D.J. Enright, I have read the section about The Hour of Death. These forty or so pages with short stories and poems offer interesting and different perspectives on the hour of death. I had not given much attention to the subject of death before taking this class. Now, I find it interesting to find so many different ways to look at death. Is it an event or a state? Is it a reflection of your life or a celebration of your death? Do you look forward to death? I mean do you look forward to that peaceful, resting that lasts forever? Does it really last forever? Is it your goal to fill your life while living so that you can actually rest when you die? Is death just time to rest? This section of the book provoked my thinking about all of this.
For example, C.G. Jung wrote, “Life is an energy-process. Like every energy-process, it is in principle irreversible and is therefore directed towards a goal. That goal is a state of rest.” This short poem continues; however, the first three lines grab your attention right away. This is the kind of reading that made me really analyze my own attitude about death. I have not decided if my ultimate goal is a state of rest. At this particular time in my life, it is all about keeping busy. Also, I have always been a multitasker; so, how could I possibly rest? I do not see that yet.
In addition, James Boswell wrote a short passage. “To my question, whether we might not fortify our minds for the approach of death, he answered, in a passion, ‘No, Sir, let it alone. It matters not how a man dies, but how he lives. The act of dying is not of importance, it lasts so short a time.’ I think Boswell reinforces the opinion that dying is actually short. It is living that is important.
The next example is from Winston Churchill. He wrote, “I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the ordeal of meeting me is another matter.” This made me laugh. It is right in tune with me. I have said something quite similar to this before. Specifically, the time when I met my son’s preschool teacher. I knew I was ready for him to go to preschool three mornings each week. I attended the orientation with my son, I remember the teacher following me through the classroom as I chased my two other children. She was trying to ask me a few questions about my son but could not get me to stand in one spot long enough to answer her. Looking back on that, it was funny. However, at the time it was probably frustrating for her. I still wonder if she was ready to meet me!

Chapter 2

What is death? What does death mean? I was about to find out in Chapter 2 of Death, Society, and Human Experience by Robert Kastenbaum. I never heard the word plastination before reading this text. It is described as replacing fluids and lipids in biological tissues with polymers which then allow medical students to study such a specimen. Plastination provides a dry, durable, odorless specimen usually on one particular body part to be studied. I had not given much thought to medical students needing body parts to study until now. This is yet another area for me to consider when thinking about death and what it really means when you are “dead.”
I learned an interesting way to relate death as a concept in the section of Death as Symbolic Construction. Specifically, water is referred to as a concept just like death is. Kastenbaum states, “We look at ice, snow, mist, rain, standing pools, and flowing streams and write the formula H2O on the board and call them all water, even though their forms look so different.” I think this comparison hits the nail on the head. Death can be described in various ways also. It caught my attention and made sense to me.
I was able to identify with some of the information in Sleep and Altered States of Consciousness. A few years ago, we had a hamster named Violet. When she died, my youngest daughter told relatives that Violet was sleeping and would not wake up. It seemed so cute at that time. However, after my daughter noticed Violet’s cage was removed, she then asked me where Violet was buried. Not thinking much about this, I told her where she was buried. Later that day, I found my daughter with shovel and bucket in hand trying to “find Violet so she could wake her up and play with her.” Needless to say, we had a conversation about the difference between death and sleep. As a result, I do not think she will try to wake up animals that are “sleeping!”
Finally, in the view of death uniting or separating relationships, I felt like I could see both positions. On a personal level, I have felt that separation when someone close to me had died. It just stayed over me like a black cloud. On the other hand, in moments of strength I would feel almost happy thinking that my loved one would now be united with his family members and friends that had died. It was confusing to me at the time. I did not really talk about this with anyone since my feelings would change with the level of strength I had at that moment. It felt good to read this now and maybe even realize that I was not confused at all.